No one expects to feel good when they're sick. But they do expect doctors and hospitals to help them feel better. Unfortunately, many things can get in the way.

Sometimes, the emotional side of illness is harder to deal with than the physical symptoms. Everybody has fears and worries, and everybody has different ways of dealing with them.

Your own attitudes and expectations play a big part in how you feel. How you cope - and how well you cope - will depend a lot on how sick you are, how long it lasts, and what resources you have available to help you.

Facing sudden illness
A sudden, serious sickness or injury that lands you in the hospital almost always creates a sense of crisis.

Your first thought will probably be "What's going to happen to me?" Most people want an honest answer to this question. Having a doctor or nurse you can trust and talk to openly will help you face what's coming.

You may also worry about your family. How will they react? Who will take care of your children while you're sick? Or you may worry about paying for your care, or losing a paycheck if you can't work.

Doctors and nurses may not be able to help with all of these things. But other people can:

• Hospital social workers may be able to get you help with family matters or financial worries. They may also be able to help you find someone to talk to about your personal concerns.
• You may also want to talk to a hospital chaplain or to your own minister, priest or rabbi.

Adjusting to the hospital
The sights and sounds of hospital life can be upsetting when you are not used to them. Sometimes, people get confused and lose their sense of time. At other times, it may be hard to tell night from day. Feelings like these usually go away very quickly, as soon as you get back to a normal routine.

Managing pain
A lot of people think that pain is an unavoidable part of illness. But pain is not something you have to endure. It can be controlled.

The first step toward controlling it is to let someone know that you have it. Doctors and nurses have no way to "measure" how much pain you're in. You are the only one who can tell them.

Many people wait until pain becomes unbearable before they tell anyone about it.

But if you speak up early, before it gets intense, you'll be able to bring it under control with lower doses of medication and fewer side effects.

Many hospitals have machines that let patients administer their own pain medication simply by pushing a button. The machine "knows" how much medication to give and how often it can be given. This system, known as patient-controlled analgesia, is a particularly good way to control pain after surgery.

If you have severe or nagging pain because of a chronic illness, you may want to ask your doctor to refer you to a pain specialist. Usually, doctors trained as anesthesiologists or pharmacologists practice this specialty. Some hospitals also operate special "pain clinics."

Doing as much as you can on your own
Even if you're not in pain when you are sick, you may need help with simple, everyday things, like washing yourself or going to the bathroom.

When you're in the hospital, it's usually easy to get the help you need. And it may be easier to take help when it's offered than to try to do things yourself. But the more help you get, the longer it may take you to get better.

Ask your doctors and nurses what you should and shouldn't try to do. And try to do as much as you can on your own - even when you're in the hospital.

Coping with long-term illness
When you're facing a long recovery, or a long-term illness or disability, it's normal to have many very different feelings as you come to terms with your situation.

At first, you may not want to take it very seriously. You may not believe what your doctors have told you. Or you may try to carry on with life as usual, as if nothing were wrong.

It may take awhile to get a real sense about what lies ahead. And it's not unusual to feel like you're on an "emotional roller coaster," at times:

• you may be afraid, even panicky, at times;
• you may be angry that this is happening to you;
• you may blame yourself for bringing it on, somehow;
• you may feel down in the dumps and wonder if you'll ever be able to live a "normal" life again.

All of these feelings are a normal part of the process of learning to manage your illness. You can and will be able to work through them, and begin to take charge of your life again.

If you have a disabling sickness or injury, you may need to learn to do everyday things in a totally new way. Take the time to find a team of doctors and nurses that you can talk to openly about your concerns and that is willing to work with you over the long term. Physical therapists, occupational therapists and rehabilitation professionals can also be helpful.

You may also want to find other people you can talk to who face situations like yours. There are hundreds of support groups and your social worker or member of your care team can help you identify and contact them. "Self-help" groups organized by other patients with similar illnesses may help you learn to manage on your own. Or, if you have access to a computer, you may find it easier to "talk" to people on the Internet.



MHA thanks the Massachusetts Hospital Association for permission to use its material in preparing this content.